Quentin Crisp quotes
Health consists of having the same diseases as one's neighbors.
If at first you don't succeed, failure may be your style.
My mother protected me from the world and my father threatened me with it.
Never keep up with the Joneses. Drag them down to your level.
The very purpose of existence is to reconcile the glowing opinion we have of ourselves with the appalling things that other people think about us.
To know all is not to forgive all. It is to despise everybody.
Treat all disasters as if they were trivialities but never treat a triviality as if it were a disaster.
When I told the people of Northern Ireland that I was an atheist, a woman in the audience stood up and said, "Yes, but is it the God of the Catholics or the God of the Protestants in whom you don't believe?"